Cert 12A
128 mims
BBFC advice: Contains moderate violence
The advice of a British-based Asian twitter follower of mine was clear but caustic when he knew that I was going to see Simranjit Singh Hundal's film..
"Take with you these items... a pillow, headphones, a book and five cans of Red Bull.''
He suggested that I would need at least two of the aforementioned adding that "the whole damned film is insanely random".
Well, I'm not sure it was as bad as all that but Mrs W didn't need a pillow to help lull her into the land of nod.
She attested that she just couldn't follow a plot which started with a fight between three village elders who had preiously stayed out of each other's way.
Twenty years on and their offspring are at the same university and have similar attitudes towards each other.
But the difference now is that two are lads (Sippy Gill and Aman Dhaliwal) and one is a pretty lass (Isha Rikhi).
Gill, in his screen debut, is a brooding suitor who simply orders any love rivals to be beaten up.
Dhaliwal is much more confident, despite his rather strange 1980s dress-sense which evokes memories of Michael Jackson in Thriller.
Sadly, the push-me, pull-you and will she, won't she storyline just drags on and on.
In fact, Jatt Boys goes on an on full stop. The slapping, the shows of macho strength, the eye-fluttering, the misunderstandings are all part of a well worn recipe.
And, even the Punjabi audience at Cineworld Birmingham weren't giggling as much as I would have expected.
This was summed up by one old fella who let out an involuntary cheer of anticipation when Punjabi comedy regular Jaswinder Bhalla appeared on screen (he plays at university lecturer).
Sadly, however, it was a prelude to tumbleweed rather than ecstatic laughter.
Laughs: none
Jumps: none
Vomit: none
Nudity: none
Overall rating: 3.5/10