Cert 15
97 mins
BBFC advice: Contains brief strong violence
Today I feel as if I have been on the end of a conspiracy to confuse me by the film industry.
What the heck does Ain't Them Bodies Saints mean? is my starter for ten when it comes to David Lowery's movie.
I am equally bewildered as to why the Sundance Festival judges seem so taken with a picture which came very close to lulling me into the land of nod.
This was more than a little disappointing because I am something of a fan of Casey Affleck and rate Rooney Mara pretty highly too.
And with Ben Foster and Keith Carradine on the cast-list I had thought it was certain that this would get a big tick from me.
It doesn't. The acting is fine, the cinematography is impressive (the movie is set in small-town Texas) but the storyline is dreary.
It surrounds a young criminal (Affleck) taking the rap instead of his pregnant wife (Mara) for shooting a cop.
She promises to wait for him to serve his time but he is impatient to see her her and his child sooner than later.
Anyway, the camera lingers on her relationship with her growing daughter, on his time in jail and on the community's treatment of both of them.
There is lots of whispered dialogue and great swathes of time in which nothing much happens at all.
Then there is a major plot development which I shall not reveal because it would ruin the film.
And that's it. A meaningless title, a couple of shootings, a desperate father and a loyal mother waiting for her man, with a lawman (Foster) and a friend (Carradine) waiting in the wings.
Duller than a cloudy day in Clacton.
Laughs: none
Jumps: none
Vomit: none
Nudity: none
Overall rating: 4/10